"For me, the biggest idiot will always be John Terry," said Ferdinand in his autobiography #2sides which is being serialised in the Sun on Sunday."As England captain and my centre-back partner he could have saved everyone a lot of pain by admitting immediately he used the word in the heat of the moment, but was no racist. I think that's probably what happened and what the truth is. Anton and I would've accepted that."The FA found that Terry had called Anton a “f****** black c***” when Chelsea faced QPR at Loftus Road in October 2011."He tried to run away from what he had done."I've never actually spoken to John about the case. I no longer talk to him, but even three years later I find it impossible to forgive or forget the pain he put us through."The case also resulted in the loss of a childhood friend, as Ferdinand revealed that he no longer speaks to Ashley Cole after the then Chelsea left back was called as a defence witness in the criminal case that saw Terry found not guilty."Ashley Cole had long been a friend of mine. We've known each other since we were kids. But for me it ended the day he decided to go to court in support of John Terry,” said Rio."Anton rang me and my head nearly blew off. He was betraying Anton, who he'd also known for years."The fall out of from the incident had further ramifications adds Ferdinand – with his mother ending up in hospital with a stress related illness after her house was vandalised and she was sent bullets in the post."My mum had her windows smashed and bullets put through her door, and ended up in hospital because of the stress," said the QPR defender.(uk.eurosport.yahoo.com)Bakudaily.Az