Meeting usually takes place at the wedding of relatives. The mother of a guy, who has come to a wedding age, is dancing in the crowd, looking for a suitable girl for her son.
Close to her she holds a relative best informed about the ancestors and financial position of all the guests at the wedding. Selecting a girl that is said to be "one hundred percent home girl" and whose Dad is said to "drive a Pajero', she grabs her son by the collar and leads him to the dance floor, where the aforementioned "home girl" is dancing surrounded by her friends and sisters. Having danced with them a minute, Mom goes away, leaving the poor children shy on the dance floor, rarely exchanging confused phrases, drowning in the din of the next Rickada-Chickada.
Mom knows, Dad does not
After acquaintance at the wedding of the relatives, advanced families practice walking the bride. The walking route and the restaurant is clearly regulated by the mother of the future groom. Usually this is an inexpensive restaurant like Port or Nargiz, or on special days Dalida. During this floral-candy period the future bride can be seen with a red rose in her hand, which her fiance bought from a young man near the cinema Azerbaijan.
All these walks are carefully hidden from the father of the bride. According to the custom, Dad pretends that nothing really happens, and his daughter still plays dolls with her classmates.
Meeting of women
It is the worst, strategically thoughtful, tense and hypocritical point in the relationship of the future couple. A сrowd of women from the groom comes to the bride's house, where they are met by all the female relatives of the poor girl. Such an amount of false laughter, fake friendliness and hypocritical helpfulness would be more than enough for all politicians of all countries of the world combined.
Toward the end of the event the women begin to praise their children, assuring each other of their uniqueness and integrity. Further, the women from the groom go, confident that they showed the "who's who" and the women from the bride seeing them off are convinced that they did not lose their image and boasted not less than their opponents.
Sweet tea
It is the funniest of traditions. A few men, for whom all has already been decided, are sitting at the table, desperately trying to find a topic for conversation. They talk about politics, economy, weather, gasoline prices, but any topic eventually ends with heavy ringing silence. Finally, the groom's father, bringing together all his determination, reminds the purpose of their visit and claims the already not necessary permission from the head of the bride's house to take the bride.
Receiving (who would have thought the other way!) a positive response, they all have sweet tea (although there are candies on the table, the men from the groom do not try them).
Bachelorette party
The usual bachelorette party is carried out. All the female relatives of the bride gather at a certain place and start talking in a free way. The absence of men creates a false sense of permissiveness, smoothly passing into anarchy.
Witch night
Miserable looking waiters and a photographer boy pray all known gods that these things quickly ended. A fat singer under a gnashing kamancha yells Be Happy. All living freezes in anticipation of the apocalypse.
Three days before the wedding
Vanity of vanities. All are busy. The groom's father is making a last-ditch attempt to bring down the price for seats in the restaurant. The younger generation urgently goes to Ganjlik, where they agree to lease a Mercedes without top (if they want to show off, they prefer a Hummer).
But the most important and responsible work involves the bride and the groom: they are surrounded by cousins and are learning a synchronized dance. For all, the success of the wedding and the whole future life precisely depends on how they will dance.
One day before the wedding
The aunt of the bride finally finds a "good" photographer just for 300 manat. The photographer (a second-year student of the Oil Academy, with a Canon newly bought on credit), is frantically digging in the camera settings, because he cannot lose the image and, because, after all, it is the first order. The bride walks around the house with a dual feeling: on the one hand, she moves from her usual home, but on the other hand, she finally leaves the place!!
Groom walking with friends
He is waliking down Torgovaya Street on the last day of his bachelor life, sadly looking at the hips of the girls walking in front, mentally saying goodbye to the brothels at 28 May and receiving condolences from each of his mates individually.
Wedding day
Almost having not slept all night with excitement, the bride in the morning runs to the salon. Today she is not sorry for any money, just to make her hairstyle last until after the wedding. Inside, she requires hair like that of Aygun Kazimova and the young hairdresser is desperately trying to make her rare and greasy hair something worthwhile.
Two jars of tonal cream, bright red lipstick, false hair (her own is still not enough), plastic false nails, circled like a panda eyes, and the bride can run home to put on a dress. On the way home she catches the eyes of all passers-by, for made-up, coiffed and with attached veil on her head, the girl is dressed in ragged home sport trousers and slippers on her feet, which looks weird.
The leased magnificent white dress is treacherously not stretched. In the case enters the corset, which visually removes the extra 10 kg. The dress yields. The groom in a black shiny suit sends for the bride.
Home of the bride
With loud music, which makes all the neighbors on the block enter the stairwell, the groom comes to the bride's house. With a large bouquet of red roses, the groom at a snail's speed, but with persistence of an icebreaker sneaks among the relatives of the bride in the back room, where the bride is all finished, with the look in her eyes, "Take me away, take away!" waiting for her knight.
Entering the room, the groom is attacked by the children who require sweets and money (mostly money only). Regretting that he did not take small change, the groom sadly gives them a couple of manat.
Receiving a bouquet after hearing final instructions from her father, having walked around the lamp three times, the bride wears a red ribbon and goes to leave. It should be noted that the red ribbon is worn almost by all brides, no matter how free lifestyle they led before.
Straightening up, they smile to the photographer, waving at the camera , and go down into the courtyard, under the familiar loud sounds of the zurna.
Way to wedding party
In the yard their Mercedes is waiting for them. Under general slamming and shouting wishes of happy life the fiance gets in the car. Suddenly realizing that something is missing, he gets out and opens the door before the bride. The embarrassed bride gets into the Mercedes and draws the curtains .
Before the Mercedes a Renault is standing. It is a yellow taxi, from the trunk of which the camera operator is looking out with his camera. It is not clear how he managed to get into the trunk. A few minutes later the Renault, the Mercedes and other cars go on a family way. At the risk of falling out of the car, the operator shoots the entire trip on a film. Around the Renault and the wedding car the relatives are driving like bees, sounding periodic signals and overtaking each other.
Love story
Along the way they stop near the Governor's Garden, as here (as if it did not sound original) pre-wedding love story series are scheduled. Poses that the couple takes during these photo sessions are very familiar to all.
1. The young are holding by the hands and the groomsmen and bridesmaids are trying to pull them apart.
2 . The bride and the groom are holding by the hands, standing back to back (almost like the Worker and the Collective Farm Girl).
3 . The bride and the groom are sitting on different edges of the bench and are looking in different directions.
4 . The groom is taking the bride in his arms (if the bride is larger, then it is vice versa).
Finally, the photoshoot ends, all are seated in the cars and driven away.
A matter of minutes remains until the wedding party in the restaurant.
Ayka Aleskerova (from page on FB)
ANN.Az
